FAQ | Joe Zu

Erotic Art / Blogging / Mentoring

Welcome

Due to the COVID-19 crisis, I am not accepting in-person appointments at this time. To make a virtual appointment conducted via Zoom or Skype, visit the Virtual Offerings page for more details, and check out the Virtual Appointments section of this FAQ.

For questions about travel beyond local outcalls, please see the Travel FAQ page.

Clientele
Access
Making Appointments
Virtual Appointments
Etiquette
Sessions
Safety and Privacy
Miscellaneous

Clientele
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Who are your clientele?
	I cater to those: * looking to learn about and explore BDSM in a safe, nurturing environment * looking for spiritual and physical healing through bodywork and Sacred Intimacy

Do you see clients who are ___?
	I do not discriminate on the basis of age (though you must be at least 21 years old), race, looks, orientation, experience-level, or ability. I am happy to work with clients of any gender or gender-identity, but my experience is primarily with male and male-identified clients. If you have special needs, please let me know before your appointment and we can discuss the best way to give you the most fulfilling experience.

I’m a straight man; does getting a massage from you mean I’m gay?
	No, it doesn’t, any more than letting a male doctor examine your prostate or your testicles to check for cancer would. If you are nervous about being touched by another man, I’m happy to discuss it with your before the appointment. Your comfort and ease is important.

Do you work with beginners?
	Absolutely. I have always enjoyed mentoring and working with beginners. I am a patient and nurturing teacher and happy to introduce someone to new sensations.

Access
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Where are you located?
	I am in SE Portland, about five miles from downtown. When you make an appointment, I will send a confirmation request a day or two before the appointment date. When you confirm, I will send you my address and directions and where you may park.

Is there parking available?
	Yes, there is free street parking nearby.

Are you accessible by public transit?
	There are stops for three bus lines within a two block radius of my location.

Is the location wheelchair accessible?
	Yes, but not all facilities inside are wheelchair accessible. Check with me before making an appointment. Also, I am also happy to do outcalls at no extra charge for those with special needs within a 6-mile radius of my location, which covers most of Portland.

Making Appointments
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How do I make an appointment?
	Go to my Contact Page and fill out the form as instructed.

How can I ensure a response to my session request?
	Please fill in all the fields. Include the type of appointment you’d like, the duration, and the date and approximate time. It is much easier for me to schedule an appointment for you this way rather than telling you when I have availability. If I’m unable to accommodate your requested date and time, I will reply with alternatives. Some of the questions I ask in my contact form are for screening purposes only. Putting in a nonsensical answer (e.g., 000-000-0000 for your phone number) will result in your email being deleted without response. Exception: if you have a particularly compelling reason not to include certain information, please explain in the message section. You may, however, then be subject to other screening procedures. When I send a request to confirm, please do not wait until the last minute to respond: i.e, if you have a 6:00pm appointment, do not wait until 5:45pm to confirm. Unless you have made a deposit, you run the risk of losing your appointment time if you do not confirm promptly. I will not respond to inquiries of a purely sexual nature.

How much advance notice do you need for an appointment?
	Occasionally I can take appointments on short notice, but booking at least 48 hours in advance is preferred.

What are your hours?
	Given enough advance notice, I am happy to make appointments on just about any day, at most hours.

I want to book a 90 minute appointment, but if I want to stop early, will I get credit or a partial refund?
	Sorry, no. You don’t eat half your dinner in a restaurant and expect to pay half the bill. If you’re not sure how long an appointment to make, start with an hour session.

Do you require deposits?
	Yes, under certain circumstances: * for certain activities (I will let you know) * for out of town visitors * if you’re making an appointment more than a week or so in advance * to cover my travel expenses beyond the local area Otherwise, generally no. Deposits are non-refundable, except under special circumstances.

Do you do outcalls?
	Yes. There is an additional charge ($30) for outcalls to the local area (within a 6-mile radius, which covers most of Portland); this charge is waived for those with special needs. Travel outside the 6-mile radius may necessitate an additional fee or a deposit or both.

Do you do travel long-distance? Internationally?
	Yes. Please see the Travel FAQ page for more information.

Do you offer discounts?
	Sliding scale pricing and limited scholarships are available for those in certain financial circumstances. I’m happy to work with you to come up with pricing that fits your ability to pay. I also offer discounts to active miltary personnel and students; in either case, please be prepared to show current and valid ID. Otherwise, my pricing is non-negotiable.

I want to explore ___ but I don’t see it listed on your website.
	Just ask. There are activities in which I don’t have enough experience to feel comfortable teaching them or I may have simply neglected to include them. I might say yes, I might say no, and I might say maybe. Don’t be shy or worry about offending me. I’m not squeamish or judgmental about discussing ideas, so feel free to ask whatever you’d like. Trust me, I’ve heard it all.

What if I have to cancel?
	I understand unexpected things happen in life which may require you to cancel. If you cannot make your appointment, please email or call me as soon as possible to reschedule or cancel. If you cancel without notification (a “no-show”), you will not be allowed to make another appointment without reimbursing me for the lost appointment, making a non-refundable deposit for future appointments, or both. If you repeatedly make appointments and cancel, even with notice, you will not be allowed to make further appointments without a non-refundable deposit.

What if I get “cold feet” before an appointment and want to cancel?
	Well, that’s entirely up to you—I’m not going to twist your arm about it. However, part of the work I do is to educate and reassure people interested in exploring their kinks or in spiritual healing. I don’t start flogging you the second you walk in the door. Especially for first-timers, I will explain what happens during a session, give you the opportunity to ask questions and voice concerns, and afterwards, give you aftercare as needed and ask you how the session went for you (what you liked, didn’t like, etc.).

Do you speak languages besides English?
	日本語が少し出来ます。 Je parle un peu de français. I can fingerspell in ASL.

Virtual Appointments
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How do I pay for a virtual appointment?
	Once an appointment date and time are set, I will send you a link to a secure online payment site, where you may use a credit card to pay. Payment for an appointment must be made in full.

How does a virtual appointment work?
	Virtual appointments will be conducted via Skype or Zoom. I will send you a link or an invitation approximately five minutes before the meeting begins.

What if I have to cancel, or change my mind?
	I will fully refund the payment for an appointment if the cancellation is made at least 48 hours in advance, minus any processing fees from the payment site. If you cancel without notification, there is no refund. You will also not be allowed to make future appointments without part of your payment being treated as a non-refundable deposit. Please note that repeated cancellations, even with sufficient notice, may necessitate a portion of your payment for further appointments being treated as a non-refundable deposit.

What if I’m late for my appointment?
	A few minutes is one thing—I’m not a hardcore clockwatcher—but much more than that will result in the time being deducted from your appointment, so please be ready to begin on time.

How should I prepare for a virtual appointment?
	Mostly, just be on time and relax. Make sure your cam and microphone are working. Turn your cell phone off or put it on mute. If it’s noisy outside where you are, you might want to keep the windows closed. If you live with someone, ask them not to disturb you during the appointment. If you are having a technical difficulty with Skype or Zoom, we can communicate via messaging, phone, or email, to try to resolve it. If it cannot be resolved in a timely manner, we can reschedule or I will refund the payment, minus any processing fees from the payment site.

Do you offer cam sex?
	Sorry, no.

You may also find answers to other questions about appointments in the Making Appointments and Etiquette sections of this page.

Etiquette
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How should I prepare for an appointment?
	Please arrive recently showered. If you are coming from work you may use my shower but it will be counted as part of your appointment time. Do not eat anything too heavy just before an appointment. If you are making an appointment for fisting, douche first—see my blog for cleaning instructions (日本語).

What is the proper etiquette during my visit?
	Please be on time. If you arrive early for your session, sometimes I will be able to accommodate you, but you may have to wait outside until I’m ready. If you are late, the time difference may be subtracted from your booked time. If you are running late, please let me know as soon as possible when I can expect you. Note to out-of-town travelers: I understand it’s difficult to predict exactly when you will arrive and you may be early or late. In such cases, I’m happy to reserve a larger block of time for you with a non-refundable deposit, with no additional charge for the extra time. Be polite, respectful, and honest. Please do not hesitate to ask questions about the session before, during, or after. Don’t be shy. There’s no such thing as a stupid question. My job is to educate you. Do not come to your appointment under the influence of drugs or alcohol (see next question). I will refuse the appointment and consider it a no-show.

Is it okay if I party and play?
	If you wish to indulge in poppers or a little 420 to relax, that’s fine, but if you show up drunk or high, you will be refused admission and your appointment considered a no-show if you do not reimburse me for my time. For your safety, you need to be aware enough during a session to tell me if you’re experiencing pain or discomfort. Also, one of the things I try to teach is how to relax (especially for fisting) without the use of recreational drugs.

What do you accept as tribute?
	For new clients, cash only, please. For established clients, at my discretion, I accept money orders, cashier checks, prepaid debit cards, and certain other methods of payment.

Should I tip or bring a gift?
	A gratuity is a great way to show me you enjoyed your experience, but it is also never expected or requested. If you’d really like to give a gift, the best thing to do is visit my Amazon Wish List. Gift cards to local businesses like Trader Joe’s, Target, Koffi, etc. are also appreciated.

Sessions
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Will a massage hurt? Isn’t it supposed to hurt?
	The purpose of a massage is not to inflict pain. I usually use a light-to-medium pressure in my work. If you feel uncomfortable or if I’m pressing too hard, please let me know so I can adjust.

I don’t want any marks on my skin!
	That’s great! I customize flogging, spanking, etc. sessions to your comfort level. There may be a temporary color change in even the most gentle of skin work that will usually fade within an hour. If you bruise easily or have sensitive areas I should avoid, please let me know in advance. However, do realize that saying, “Please spank me as hard as you can, but don’t leave any marks!” is highly unrealistic.

Will I get aftercare?
	I insist on it. It may vary from experience to experience, but I will give you the chance to relax and catch your breath, offer you some water, talk you back “down” to earth if you’re feeling a euphoric rush from the session (from the endorphins or adrenalin), or whatever else may be required. Any Dom who just boots someone out when a session ends is behaving irresponsibly.

What will my experience be like?
	No two experiences are alike, even for the same person. It depends on what you’re interested in exploring, the intensity level you’re looking for, and how far you’d like to push your limits.

I need to keep my phone handy because I’m expecting a call, is that okay?
	If you’re expecting an important call, you should schedule your appointment for another time. How are you supposed to relax and let go if you have one ear listening for your phone? Therefore, to maximize your experience, once you have arrived, please turn off or silence all devices.

May I use your shower afterwards?
	Absolutely.

You don’t look like a Dom. Where’s the leather? Where are the whips and chains?
	While the leather clad Master in a dark dungeon is what most people imagine when they think about BDSM, Dom-ming isn’t always about pain and punishment and cruelty. There are many Dom styles: one can be sensual or rough, whimsical or cruel. Some Doms are detached, some are teasing, some are nurturing. There are vanilla Doms, kinky Doms, sadistic Doms, ironic Doms, and comical Doms. Just think about teachers you’ve had in the past: some where warm and inspiring, some were cold and factual, some were dedicated instructors, and some just wanted a paycheck. Not every Dom session is about pain and humiliation and punishment. Sometimes people just need a commanding, decisive mentor who will listen, provide compassion and empathy, and even offer strong shoulders and arms for reassurance and comfort. I tend towards quieter sessions. I don’t need to shout to get my point across or be in charge. That doesn’t mean I’m a pushover or a doormat. I’m more than happy to humiliate you if that’s what floats your boat. I also believe in “less is more”: owning a thousand floggers doesn’t make someone a better Dom.

Can I be your slave?
	I’m not looking for any full-time slaves right now, but am always happy to schedule a session for those interested in having a slave experience.

What’s the difference between a sub and a slave?
	Opinions vary from Dom to Dom, but in one sense, a sub will submit to a Dom to get a particular experience. A slave is someone seeking to serve; his pleasure is in serving. A Master might tell a slave to stand in the middle of the room and hold a cup for three hours. A sub might think this is boring and meaningless, but a slave would think, “This is what makes my Master happy, so I’m happy to do it.” That said, a responsible Master never abuses his slaves or goes beyond agreed boundaries.

Safety & Privacy
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What will you do to keep my privacy?
	Privacy and discretion is assured for all the experiences I provide. What occurs behind closed doors, between you and me, remains confidential. I take my work very seriously and always behave in a professional manner. Recording of sessions is not permitted except by prior agreement.

What are the risks with this experience?
	In any kind of physical activity, there is some level of risk. The best you can do is choose providers wisely and be educated. You wouldn’t go skydiving without lessons, or just pick a tattoo artist at random, right? You could cross the street to borrow some sugar from a neighbor and get hit by a car. My responsibility is to educate and to ensure your safety. Ultimately, the decision to engage in any activity and accept the risks is yours. Please also see the BDSM safety page regarding consent, limits, negotiation, and safewords.

What if something goes wrong?
	Your care and safety is paramount throughout the appointment. However, if an emergency arises, I will take you to the nearest ER, Urgent Care Center, or call 911. Medical bills, however, are entirely your responsibility.

Miscellaneous
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What is your ethnic background?
	I am half-Japanese. I looked more Asian as a child, then more Hispanic as a young man. Now, people just tell me that “I can’t quite figure out what you are.”

What are your vital statistics?
	Salt-and-pepper hair. Hazel eyes. Five feet, eleven inches tall. One hundred fifty-five pounds.

Is this what you do for a living?
	Yes, and because of that, I take my work very seriously. I treat clients respectfully and discreetly, just like a doctor would with his patients, and I ask for the same in return. For that reason, I am quite serious about etiquette when it comes to making and keeping appointments.

Do you pay taxes?
	Yes.

I bet you really like your job!
	I do, indeed! I get to meet interesting people and educate and enlighten them.

What sort of training have you been through?
	A combination of trial-and-error and seminars and workshops. Lots of reading and research. I discuss with my subs before a session to find out their limits and boundaries, and after a session to find out what worked and what didn’t, so I’m constantly improving my skills. Having been on the receiving end of untrained or just inconsiderate partners, I do not want anyone to have to go through that. You should leave my sessions eager for more, not discouraged from trying again.

Are those photos really you? How recent are they?
	Yes; the pictures were taken over the last few years, but the Welcome page photo is always the most recent (taken May 2020).

I’d like to know more about you.
	Check out the About Joe Zu page.

I don’t see my question answered here.
	Use the contact form if you have other questions.
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FAQ / よくある質問